Top 5 Best Sneaky Places to Cheat With Your Lover (And the Worst)

By now you’ve made a connection and are feeling your passions fly out of control. That’s the joy of dating while married, isn’t it?

Yet, the next challenge of finding out the “where and when” is no easy feat. If you get caught, it’s a real buzz kill. If you don’t take a chance and summon up courage to go through with it soon enough…your partner may get tired of waiting.

Now is the time to act. So you might as well decide in advance some smart, creative places to cheat. Here are the five best places to cheat (and one worst) when you’re married and the pros and cons of each scenario.

Don’t: At Home

You’re playing a dangerous game by keeping the sex at home – either when your partner is away at work or at a social function, or while your partner is sleeping in the other room. Hot! Only thing is…you’re really likely to get caught in this situation, since real life is not really like Internet porn.

PROS: Sex is extremely guilt-ridden, taboo and dangerous – a huge rush with great orgasmic potential.

CONS: Not just a risk of your partner walking in on you, but also you’re more likely to leave clues around the house, making your partner suspicious.

Can you really hold strong under Q&A questioning? A spouse hot on your trail is worse than a cop!

Do: A Hotel

best places to cheat

Hotels might well be the most preferable option, since you can splurge on a nice classy place with a romantic dinner (hopefully out of town) or even rent a cheap hotel room for just a few hours for a low price.

If you’re going to go the hotel route, play it safe. Work with cash only and leave no trail of evidence behind.

PROS: Discretion, quietness and a relatively safe way to get the privacy you need.

CONS: Cheap hotels are not romantic and may actually turn your partner off from the sizzling sex you’ve been talking about. There are resort hotels which are great, of course, but they will cost you an arm and a leg, especially since it’s best to arrange for a hotel out of town and not nearby.

Do: Airbnb

Surprisingly, sex is okay with many homeowners who rent out their homes to guests for Airbnb. While a few homeowners may have requests against such acts if you’re open about your reasons and only want to stay for an hour or so, if you rent for the day or night and pretend like you’re a married couple, you may find less discomfort.

Many Airbnb hosts see no difference between their rented room and any ordinary hotel. There was a Business Insider feature story a while back detailing how Airbnb is becoming notorious for hookups and younger crowds.

Do: Backseat of a Car

best places to cheat

Call this the Craigslist option because it’s a little unorthodox and for the truly eccentric among us. The backseat of a car allows you to have some privacy, while also avoiding the usual problems with hotel bookings, and the risk of being discovered that comes with that.

If you’re going to have sex in the backseat of a car, it’s best to pick an out of the way spot, like a drive-in theater, an unpopulated nature retreat, or another deserted part of the city.

PROS: Very hot, to make out in a car and “lose control” of where you are. It’s like you’re teenagers again and you’re flirting with that taboo of going too far. You save on money for sure.

CONS: There’s more of a risk of being caught, not to mention the added risk of a police officer breaking up your party, or even a mugger, depending on where you are in the city.

The cramp spaced is also not conducive to erotic positions. Your only options, realistically speaking, are oral, missionary and maybe woman on top—if she’s particularly limber.

A better idea may be to arrange for a truck make out session, since you can make love on the bed, preferably at a camping site or someone where out in the quiet country where you won’t be discovered. Just bring a few extra blankets for a comfortable fling.

Do: In Public

best places to cheat

Obviously, you want to be very, very careful when venturing out for some sexy time. But there are many ways to make this work well away from spying eyes.

If you live near a beach, setting up a tent or even a simple picnic spot in the evenings is a low-key and even romantic way to get it on.

If you and your affair partner are both into nature, hiking trails offer plenty of opportunities for privacy, although you’ll most likely have to do it standing up.

If you really want to get creative, think outside the box bed. There are spas and resorts where you can rent a couples jacuzzi for a few hours, providing you utter privacy to get it on and some restful relaxation.

Other ideas? You’d be surprised how underused stairways are. Many rooftops are similarly under-occupied. Get creative.


Do: Online Fooling Around

Lastly, if you can’t seem to get away from work or home, you can always fool around online after your spouse goes to bed. With online messenger or the option of private chat rooms, you can keep things quiet. If your spouse is a heavy sleeper, you can even try web cam.

If your schedules can’t seem to coincide, write emails to each other, with explicit sexual fantasies.

As you can see, arranging for a classy and enjoyable affair depends on your imagination and romantic nature. Any place can be an ideal location if the chemistry is good and you’ve thought the fantasy through.

How to Avoid Jealous Affair Partners: Look Out for These 7 Signs

Warning: just because you find someone on the Internet who says they don’t want drama doesn’t mean they’re telling the truth!

Drama queens (and kings) tend to lay low and make you THINK it’s all about sex. But the truth is, they enter these relationships for dysfunctional reasons. They WANT the drama and that’s pretty much all they get from it.

The best thing for you to do, if you want to keep this affair discreet and problem-free, is to learn how to identify jealous affair partners and avoid them like the plague. Look for these “symptoms” of malfunctioning lovers.

They want to “save you”

These lovers are an episode of The Young and the Restless waiting to happen. It’s not enough that you’re together for the moment…they want to believe that they are saving you from your terrible life. They are your savior and you owe them the world.

That’s a dangerous place to be if your objective is to have guilt-free fun. In an ideal affair, both partners respect the emotional bonds of the non-cheating spouse. They want the marriages to work…they don’t want to trade partners. If your sex partner has delusions of rescuing you, avoid them at all costs!

They’re lonely and want to fall in love

First rule of affairs – don’t fall in love. You can’t afford to lose your family. Most single men and women who enter a relationship “open-minded” are a huge risk. What you do want are closed-minded lovers who understand this is a purely sexual relationship with no hope of emotional fulfillment.

Polyamorous lovers, sugar babies and escorts are closed-minded in that they know there are rules that should never be broken…and that these relationships are ultimately doomed. They have no delusions about falling in love and that is what you want to find.

They want to know too much

Avoid lovers who ask too many personal questions or who want to talk about life.

Sorry, but casual affairs are NOT about finding a second spouse. While it’s tempting to play “house” with the other affair partner and confide everything you dislike about your home life, it’s a dangerous game.

If you love your spouse, you emotionally confide in them. You leave sex for your lovers. There are plenty of fun and sexy things to talk about with a lover, in fact so much so, that there should be no extra time to talk about “real life.”

If talking about cheating on your spouse(s) turns you on, then make it vague. Don’t go into detail and don’t ask for more information. Keep things fun and mysterious.

They think about the future

Avoid partners who keep thinking and talking about the future…with you in it.

The future is supposed to be uncertain. Affairs are about the now because there well may never be a tomorrow. Partners who insist on knowing the future of the relationship are trouble.

You, talking about the future to a partner (even if you think they understand that you’re just goofing around) is a big mistake. Do not lead a casual partner on to think there’s a future when there clearly isn’t.

They feel guilty

Avoid partners who admit that they feel guilty.

For one thing, don’t bring up guilt. No one really wants to talk about guilt during an affair. But beyond that, if your partner admits readily that they have second thoughts about what they’re doing, it’s usually a red flag that this is going to end badly.

If you’re lucky, that means they might just stop seeing you without an explanation. But if you’re not so lucky, they might confess to their partner what has happened out of guilt and a need to repent for their mistakes.

They don’t respect boundaries

Avoid partners who cross your boundaries and constantly test you.

Seriously, don’t underestimate the crazy psycho-sexual partner who constantly pushes you past your limits. Sure, it’s sexy at first…but eventually you realize the thrill for them is in manipulating you and toying with you.

Their motivation is to break you, to provoke you, and to bring out your weakness. They are primarily motivated by jealousy; even though they may not want you all to themselves, they DO want your attention constantly.

This can get ugly very fast. The best sexual partners are people who are not emotionally volatile one way or the other, but respect the discretion and boundaries of both partners.

They’re single

This is somewhat controversial in affair circles but if you really want to err on the safe side and avoid life-destroying jealousy, take our advice and avoid singles and stick to people who are married and have children.

People who are (seemingly) happily married are far less likely to become jealous or try to transform the relationship into a new marriage. They realize that their family life is content…it’s everything they want socially and emotionally.

They just realize that they need a little bit extra kink. This means that they have just as much to risk as you do, and so they will collaborate with you on believable alibis to keep the affair secret.

Don’t Want to Get Caught? 4 Things to Look for in the Perfect Affair Partner

When you’re head over heels in love (or in lust, let’s be honest!) it’s sometimes hard to think rationally. You’re consumed by your crush’s beauty and alluring personality. You know the affair is inevitable.

Maybe if you keep things quiet, you can have your cake and eat it too, so to speak. You can satisfy your curiosity without disrupting your family. The problem is…many people who cheat are caught and humiliated…and sometimes their lives are ruined!

The problem is that most of the things your instincts are saying to you, about the logistics of the affair, are totally wrong. You’re thinking emotionally and not logically.

Emotion is fine for the affair itself, but if you’re serious about planning an affair you have to avoid the most common mistakes that get lovers caught – and usually within days or weeks!

So here are four things to look for when choosing the perfect affair partner to not get caught with…

A Smart Liar

Things to Look for in the Perfect Affair Partner

One of the best qualities an affair partner can have? A good liar that’s smart enough to cover all the bases.

Sorry if that sounds uncouth, but let’s face it. Poor liars are always the ones who get caught first. Many cheaters are completely inept when it comes to telling a simple lie and then keeping their story straight.

All it really takes to bust a cheater is a suspicious husband/wife interrogating the cheating partner and taking mental notes of what the partner said.

If you (or your lover) blow the cover and the lie is apparent, the affair is pretty much exposed. This is why it’s a good idea to ground excuses in reality and truth, rather than try too hard to come up with elaborate and detailed excuses.

Simple lies (based on some truth that DID happen) are the best way to get away with it.

Choose a partner who is an experienced liar and can create a convincing “story”. For example: a poker game with the guys, a book group with the girls, volunteering somewhere, or seeing family members.

A good sex partner has to have some imagination but also a keen sense of logic. A smart cheating partner will also go over details of your cover story together, anticipating conversations that could tip your spouse off.

They don’t just lie to end a conversation…they plan, and they are precise in the excuses they create.

Married with Children

Someone who is married with children…in other words, stable!

The worst kind of mistress or lover is one who is single, lonely and willing to do ANYTHING to get your attention. Sure, these fools are pretty or handsome…but they’re too much to deal with if your priority is to have a discreet affair.

That’s why it’s best to choose someone with a family, with multiple responsibilities, and with a “perfect life” on the exterior. In other words, someone who has just as much to lose as you do.

Mothers with children, an active social life, or with a demanding husband certainly don’t want to rock the boat, and more often than not, will desperately help you keep the affair secret and discreet.

Not in Your Inner Circle

Someone outside…way outside your family and circle of friends.

Most affairs that happen with friends of friends or friends of relatives are destined to be discovered. The best advice for keeping an affair quiet is to find someone who’s not at all related to you, or that has anything to do with you.

So no, your spouse’s best friend, your co-worker, your boss, your landlord – they might be hot fantasies but these are all terrible scenarios and are at high risk for being discovered through the grapevine.

People talk. Find a sex partner who literally knows nothing about your circle of friends.

Yes, this means the best way to date is online, using one of the best affairs websites or apps, where you can select the location and keep your information anonymous. True, it may not be emotionally engaging to have an affair with a stranger but…

Not Looking for More

Things to Look for in the Perfect Affair Partner

You WANT someone who’s not looking for an emotional relationship.

Ideally, you don’t want emotion involved in your affair. If your partner’s marriage is terrible and crumbling and they need someone to save them, love them or coddle them emotionally, you’re asking for trouble.

The best kind of sex partner is someone not looking for emotional investment. They may enjoy emotional sex, but they are NOT in need of love. This person already has their emotional needs met through their marriage or other committed relationship.

If you want to fall in love, prepare for a messy scene. If you want to have an affair discreetly, make sure this is just a physical relationship and nothing more.

Pick someone who’s invested in their life and in a comparable situation to you – someone that doesn’t want to lose their family, home life, business life and reputation. The more you find a partner who’s more in line with your thinking, the less stressful this steamy affair will be!

No Luck on Affair Dating Sites? Here’s 8 Reasons Why

So…you’ve been using Tinder, Craiglist, Ashley Madison and KIK for a while now. But you just can’t seem to find ANY women interested in you. What gives?

“I thought the ads said hundreds of hot women were just waiting to chat with me!”

You have to wonder at some point why none of these “fish” are biting and whether there really are plenty of these hot cheating marrieds in the sea or not. Do they not like married guys? Do they not like the way you look?

Well allow me to explain why some men are batting zero and others are, ahem, scoring and hitting a home run every weekend. I’ve observed these tidbits of advice through a long and careful research process consisting of:

  • Hitting on married women through online dating sites.
  • Meeting wild women in bars.
  • Going undercover as a married woman and seeing what guys are saying.
  • And asking women online straight out, just what are most guys doing wrong in dating?

Here are eight reasons I found that men are not getting laid…regardless of how much they pay for exclusive membership.

You’re boring

Try to understand the plight of the married hottie. She’s being bombarded with message requests and barely has time to respond to a few, let alone converse with someone at length.

She immediately tunes out guys who ask ASL?, or talk in too many abbreviations, or just respond with a “hi”. She needs something more dramatic, or funny, or interesting or at least more emotionally evocative.

Ultimately, if you’re one out of 2,394 guys who are sending her uninteresting one-liners…what incentive does she have to respond to you?

You’re too lazy

From my experience with women in person and texting, what I’ve learned is that they are waiting on you to entertain them. I don’t really believe in the saying that says, “Men are just too horny.” Because women ARE horny.

But it’s just that men are so lazy nowadays they just say a slew of four-letter words and demand their female audience send naked pictures.

Where is the effort? How are these men EARNING this attention? These guys are not over-the-top perverted, they’re just lazy. They want a woman to do everything for them without giving them much of anything besides a foul mouth.

Women can be just as dirty as you…but you have to turn them on. You have to make them laugh, make them feel, and make them interested in the conversation.

So put in the effort before you expect her to .

Bad profile descriptions and bad photos

Let’s be honest, some guys are just way out of their league if they’re going after 10s and 9s with a double chin, creepy mustache picture for a profile.

Even worse is the fact that a lot of guys fill their already ugly profile pictures with gibberish – boring descriptions that either say too much or too little.

Here’s the trick: make sure your profile features an attractive photo and then say something that makes a woman FEEL. Don’t tell them your life’s story. Don’t be melodramatic. Be funny, be sexy, or be intelligent.

A profile is a first impression and not putting any thought into it, will get back nothing.

You’re saying too much

From my female interview subjects I found out that quite a few intelligent guys were being filtered out from dates because they tried too hard in the initial conversation.

While it’s good to be intelligent and put forth effort to please a woman, writing a long-winded text is just too taxing on the brain. She wants to feel more so than she wants to think. Keep things mysterious rather than overly literary. No need to go full Sheldon Cooper.

You’re too drunk…either online or in person

Generally speaking, a man should be tipsy (a little buzzed) and match the mood and temperament of a woman. Too many men (especially in bars) make an ass of themselves and end up stinking drunk – and somehow they think this entitles them to drunken sex.

Not likely…most women will not go home with a drunken lunatic, even if they’re slightly drunk. They want to feel and remember the sexual experience, not guide you to the toilet.

You’re an asshole

Too many men misunderstand the rules of seduction. Rather than being funny and antagonistic, these guys are just plain rude and mean-spirited.

They say vile things hoping to get a reaction, but end up scaring the woman off – and rightly so. Players ARE nice guys…they just know how to push those buttons at the right time. But being insulting to a beautiful woman is always a one way ticket to Lonesome Town.

You’re not “marketing” yourself as above average

Really, the only thing a woman needs to go home with you is to see evidence that you’re above average. No woman wants to make out with an average guy. So decide upon what makes you unique and run with that.

Make that the focus. Whether it’s your imagination, sense of humor, body, confidence, whatever it is, let that define you and let her know you can offer this quality more than anyone else. Climb out of the gutter of being too ordinary.

You’re too friendly and not enough sexy

Let’s be honest. Married women, or really any woman looking for a casual affair, is not looking for a good friend. From what I’ve observed, way too many guys approach women in a totally non-sexual state.

They chatter, they ask about a woman’s day, her life, her happiness and so on. But they don’t talk about sex. Or they demand the woman tell them her fantasy. It doesn’t really work that way.

A man should be charming, intelligent and classy…but he should nonetheless be interested in sex and be very forward in telling a woman what he wants. The key is to be subtle and creative…not to be ambiguous.

These eight reasons are enough to friend-zone you into hell! Make it a point to the become the opposite of all these mistakes. Show a woman why you’re sexy guy and why you’re a cut above the rest, and you will definitely see an uptick in the affairs you find online.

Who’s the Perfect Affair Partner? 7 Types of Lovers to Cheat With

Is there an ideal type of affair partner if you don’t want to get caught and just want to enjoy sex guilt-free and easy?

Yes and it’s usually not the type of lover that makes for wild sex fantasies. Cheating within the in-laws family, or workmates, or household help or neighbors, is risky business. Most partners agree, choosing someone you don’t already know, and who’s married and also responsible for a family, is the safest best.

But it’s also well known that not all married partner want to cheat – and even some single people will not fool around with someone who’s married. This leaves you in a pickle! Who are, statistically speaking, the most likely lovers you’re going to be paired with and what are the pros and cons of dating each?

The Married Lover

perfect affair partner

Let’s start with the most obvious choice. A married person you meet on the internet or by happenstance in a physical location, is a sure bet for a discreet affair. The fact that they’re married ensures that you will both work to keep the affair private and the two families undisturbed.

Pros: Definitely have an insurance policy, since you can both collaborate on lies and work together on building evidence of your non-cheating.

Plus, married partners rarely leave their spouse, especially if they have younger children, so you don’t have to worry about this getting blown out of proportion.

Cons: Married partners typically lack something in their marriage – usually emotional fulfillment. Therefore, they may begin to treat you as a second spouse, rather than just a lover. They may be eager to share news, eager to talk, and may even confide in their partner’s bad behavior.

Strangely enough, some married lovers will even mention their partners to their spouse in a platonic way – sort of testing their limits. Or bragging. In short, married lovers tend to come with drama in some fashion or another.

The Clueless One Night Stand

Whether you meet this person in a bar or a club, one thing’s obvious. It’s only going to last one night. All you do is mindlessly flirt, dance, drink and avoid too many personal questions. It’s easy to have a one night stand IF you avoid talking about being unhappily married.

Pros: Many lovers you meet in a bar or club will either be oblivious to the fact that you’re married or simply won’t care. If there is an immediate attraction between the two of you, it’s likely your odds of getting laid will increase. Since you may never see this person again, this is a great choice for frequent travelers.

Cons: The bad news here is that some lovers will really want to know that you are not married. And if they are naïve and believe that you’re single, or widowed, or divorced, and then find out the truth somehow…there could be hell to pay.

This person may take your lie personally and see fit to tell your spouse. This is why you really have to make sure it’s a one night stand and not a recurring relationship.

The Workaholic Executive

perfect affair partner

This lover is pretty stressed…and as a result, he/she tends to lose their conscience and inherent sense of guilt. They know you’re married and don’t care because they don’t have much time to date or love to give, and so figure, a married partner is just what they need.

Their motivation is usually a strong sense of competition with your partner (or your partner’s personality type) or maybe just the thrill of winning a married lover.

Pros: Great at keeping drama to the minimum. Professional-minded. Travels frequently and not likely to be possessive. Always looking for the next conquest in between their career ladder climb.

Cons: Will likely get bored of you, so enjoy it while you can and don’t make a scene when he/she decides the affair is done.

Polyamorous Lover(s)

Polyamorous lovers refer to a “marriage” of sorts, usually involving multiple partners who are faithful in a non-monogamous way. This may include swinging couples, threesome marriages, BDSM masters and slaves, and so on. Some DO prefer that their lovers not be married, but surprisingly, many don’t.

Pros: These lovers buck the traditional concept of marriage and so they often entertain lovers who are married, since they understand your non-monogamous desires better than anyone.

Cons: These people tend to be defensive about their own lifestyles and sometimes judgmental about yours. Don’t be surprised if you clash with them when it comes to etiquette or differences of opinion. They want what they want and will essentially demand you be a willing slave. Not for all tastes, but if you like to please they will have you!

Sugar Babies

perfect affair partner

The “kept women” of the modern era, sugar babies can make surprisingly great affair partners. These lovers tend to be younger and are willing to readily give you exactly what you want…granted you scratch their back as well with regular shopping trips and all their living expenses taken care of.

They enjoy the idea of breaking the rules and having a (rich) older lover spoil them with gifts and free rides. If you want fun (and have the resources), sugar babies are a great way to spend your savings account.

Pros: Sugar babies actually seem to enjoy being flaunted around town, are up for sexual relationships, and many don’t care that you’re married. Their youth makes them particularly open to suggestion, so be a teacher in the bedroom.

Cons: You better have enough money because once you stop paying, the sugar relationship is over.

Rebound Dates

Men and women on the “rebound” are so wrapped up in themselves, they will usually not care about your marital status. They just want to be desired and seen as very attractive – even worth leaving your spouse for!

The typical story is that they just got out of a long relationship and are not looking for another…they just want sex.

Pros: The good news is they really DON’T want to ruin your marriage. They just want reassurance and ego-massaging.

Cons: Don’t expect these lovers to last very long. As soon as they get their self-esteem back they will dump you in a hurry and go back to living a pristine social life.


perfect affair partner

Escorts may well be the ideal choice for a discreet sex partner. As a movie star once said, “I don’t pay women to have sex with me…I pay them to leave.” Escorts understand this lesson more than anyone and frankly, it’s part of their job description.

They’re paid to leave, to be professional and not clingy. Escorts don’t care about marital status…they just want to get paid.

Pros: You really do get your choice of body and personality types. Escorts tend to be more intelligent and cultured than bar hopping girls, prostitutes and drama queens looking for married men to jerk around.

Cons: There is some concern over STDs, although some escorts may agree to be tested. Then again, many will not and will insist you just use a condom. Condoms are not guaranteed to protect against STDs, unfortunately.

As you can see, all of these affair partner types have their pros and cons and can be ideal for you, depending on your situation. Weigh the pros and cons and determine what you can live with, and what you can’t. Avoid drama and stick to the loveless sex. That’s what make affairs fun and stress-free!

Where to Meet Your Affair Partner? 6 Tips for Choosing Discreet Date Spots

You know you can’t fight it anymore. You’ve already decided that you have to have an affair to satisfy this urge deep within your soul. Maybe you should hook up with your crush next door…or your sister’s friend, or your teacher…or…

Wait! That’s actually a really bad idea. The first rule of cheating, if you don’t want to get caught and expose yourself to a heap of drama, is to choose someone who has NO connection to your home life. Preferably, someone your spouse has never met, nor has anyone from your family or friends ever met them.

The best place to meet someone is online, or maybe at a bar or club. Of course, once you make the connection, it can be difficult to maintain the relationship, since one or both of you have to keep it a secret.

Relax, we have six ideas for you on where to meet your newest fling discreetly for an extramarital affair – and hopefully one that doesn’t end with a surprise visit by the reality show Cheaters.

Go somewhere out of town

Naturally, driving out of town is the best plan to avoid bumping into someone you know. Choose a location that’s new to both of you, one where you won’t be recognized by her friends, family, or yours.

Dinner is a very public location and if you know 100 or more people and he/she knows 100 or more people, the odds of rumors circulating increases.

The darker, the better

where to have an affair

Go to a dark theater or auditorium, somewhere out of view.

Dating is difficult when you’re stuck in town, and especially with a well lit room open to everyone’s judgmental eyes. So take advantage of a dark theater, a comedy show, musical or concert, where the view of others is obstructed.

It’s also a more romantic setting where you can quietly enjoy each other’s company, hold hands, and whisper sweet nothings.

Keep things professional at work

You’ll find that many people have mixed feelings on dating someone you know from work. On one hand, work can spill over into home life quickly.

On the other hand, you may actually like the pretend game you’re forced to play, keeping things professional, and yet communicating with secret glances, notes, and emails.

You can’t touch or flirt in public but you still can communicate in secret. Sometimes you may even be able to touch each other when no one else is looking. Just be careful not to get caught by management!

Continue your erotic conversation online

It’s actually easier and more fun to continue and build an existing relationship online than it is to start one from scratch. Online communication takes advantage of your imagination, builds intimacy, and allows the both of you to be bold and dangerous…even in a safe setting.

You can communicate through email, online messenger, web cam app, or texting. It’s a great way to date intellectually when you can’t be together physically.

Birds of a feather fly together

where to have an affair

Call in favors from a friend or relative…One who can relate to your problem!

Friends are there to help you out, right? Don’t be so sure. Some friends will be there for you…and some will betray you in a heartbeat.

Rather than count on all your friends to be your BFF, it’s better to stick with friends who have cheated before or who are accepting of your affair – possibly because they know why you cheat and why it’s difficult to live with your spouse.

If this is the case, a friend may help you by securing a location for you, such as a cabin in the woods, a summerhouse, or some other rental unit for your dating pleasure.

Business meetings away from home

Although most people meet their mistresses in a bar or club setting (where alcohol flows freely), a surprising number of people first meet their new partners at a business function.

Since this setting is not necessarily “at work” (it could be a business training seminar, a client meeting, a networking opportunity), there is more freedom and not as many watchful eyes.

Besides, plenty of unhappily married people bury themselves in their work. Not only are business functions a great place to meet a new partner, but you can also continue dating at such functions, conveniently using the excuse of having to work extra hours. And hey, the boss thinks you’re doing great putting all this extra time in!

Did you know that according to Ashley Madison statistics, it only takes a person approximately 36 hours to find a partner for an affair?

You might say that finding a lover is the easy part (as long as you’re not extremely picky). The hard part may well be finding time and location to intensify the affair. However, these tips can help you get started and make this one a love for the ages.

You can find people to have an affair with anywhere. If you would prefer to do it in person, then depending on the kind of person you want to have an affair with, you should go to requisite places.

Bars and pubs are good place to find men and women having affairs. In these places, the people are usually relaxed and unwinding, and hence are easy to approach. They are also looking to have a good time. So you can simply strike a conversation with them and find out if they are willing or available to have an affair.

7 Best Places to Find Ready and Willing Affair Partners

Are you trying to cheat on your spouse but dammit – you just can’t seem to find any willing partners at the grocery store, or the PTA meeting, the library or in church?

Yeah buddy, maybe you’re looking in all the wrong places!

The fact is, sometimes our delusional fantasies about who it would be fun to cheat with don’t match the realistic odds of who we’re likely to cheat with.

Remember that just because you’re attracted to somebody doesn’t really mean you have a chance with them, despite all the bro-seduction techniques you’ve looked up. Sometimes successfully cheating is more about opportunity and timing than it is about killer charm.

Therefore, rather than give you tips on how to try to seduce a person anytime-anywhere, let’s focus on the best PLACES to go where you can probably find better success in scoring a one night stand or a long term affair.


best place to find an affair

There are numerous apps on Android and Apple IOS and other interfaces that can help you meet the beautiful home wrecker of your dreams.

Not only can you find matches among other unhappily married people (like Ashley Madison) but you can also find apps that will actually help you hide your information from your husband/wife. For example, BlackBook on Blackberry has a special password feature that requires you entering in a correct password or else it sends the whole Smartphone into a “dead battery” mode, guaranteeing your spouse won’t find evidence of infidelity.

Even some seemingly innocent sites like Whisper or Craigslist can make you a naughty connection. For better results, if you’re a man, then aim to meet husband and wife couples who swing and may be more inclined to welcome an anonymous man or married man into their threesomes.

To go to the top of the list, include a good picture and be in shape…oh and the bigger your ding-a-ling, the better.

A Bar or Nightclub

No, it’s not always easy to get laid just by going to a club or bar but it’s still the most practical location to scout if you have money, like to dance and want to flirt right away.

A lot of women will show up to bars, though perhaps accompanied by their female friends. Girls nights out aren’t always random nights of fun; they are often prompted by one woman feeling unloved, or going through a separation, or having lost a boyfriend.

One of the first things girls talk about on girls’ nights out is their lack of sex. And if the sexually frustrated woman happens to meet a gorgeous guy in a bar, and the timing is right, her friends may actually egg her on to some fun.

Exotic Hotels

Don’t bother with local hotels, but try exotic locations. Many women who don’t want to admit to others or themselves that they want sex with a stranger will go on vacation and hang out at the beach or go sightseeing. I

f you can come across as cool, fun, intelligent and handsome, you may be able to make good use of that rented hotel room.

Another odd fact: sometimes the woman in question may be married herself and looking to cheat with anyone, while her husband philanders with another woman or simply ignores her as always.

At Work

best place to find an affair

Meeting an attractive coworker is always an option because, in essence, you’re talking about your “second family.” Your attractive coworker will get to know you on a personal level and see you at your best, worst and most impressive.

It’s not surprising then that many coworkers experiment sexually afterhours, and particularly bosses and employees, who love flirting with that disastrous power dynamic. Mister Grey, you didn’t help matters with all that office spanking!

Mutual respect and admiration frequently happen at work and it also provides the perfect alibi. Hell, sometimes it provides the perfect location too, if the office is deserted late at night or if it’s a building with just a few employees, giving lots of free space and a quiet atmosphere.

Just a reminder though…a lot of companies will immediately fire employees who fool around in or even outside of the office, if there is any reason for scandal. It’s kind of like playing with fire…although that “fire” is really hot when you manage to avoid getting caught.

The Park?!

This is a bit of a strange one, because of all the times you’ve went to the park, how many times have you seen people going at it behind the bushes? Yet, there have been more and more incidents of police officers busting people at park restrooms who were engaged in public sex.

Granted, if you’re a man, you’re probably more likely to find gay sex at a park than some random woman giving it away for free. But the number of times police officers have busted park perverts is alarming and thus it’s worth some dishonorable mention.

Think of the park not so much as a place to score an immediate lay but a place to meet people outside your social circle who may be open to more intimate fun later.

A Brothel or Escort Service

Depending on where you live and how far you can travel, you may be tempted to book an appointment at a legal brothel (currently only in the state of Nevada) or a more local venue such as an escort service, massage parlor or ahem, a very open-minded girl who would appreciate some “roses” (to put it in code talk).

While some younger men scoff at the idea of having to pay for sex, older men may appreciate the lack of drama booking an escort or prostitute offers, compared to actually dealing with a mistress.

She’s not just paid to have sex, but also paid to forget about it and never call him after the fact.

For many men who don’t want to waste time or money being a sugar daddy, they just skip the courtship and go right to the intimacy. And if Mad Men taught us anything, it’s that escorts are far from “a cheap alternative” – after all, classy rich guys do it all the time!

Masquerade Party

best place to find an affair

There’s something very sexy about a masquerade party, Halloween party, or the more modern option of an Anime / Comic Book Convention. People dress up, oftentimes in very scandalous and suggestive clothing, and embrace their “avatar” rather than their true selves.

This gives many women an opportunity to have no-strings-attached sex with another “character” they find attractive, and the less they know about each other the better.

Now we’re not guaranteeing that just because you go dressed as Ant-Man, you’re going to get laid by Black Widow or Wonder Woman. (And right about now, we’re imagining an awesome DC / Marvel Crossover of XXX-rated proportions).

But statistically speaking, yes, you’re probably more likely to meet a horny woman at a costume party than a regular facility, like a bookstore, mall or a coffee shop.

And yes, just in case you’re wondering, your best friend’s wedding (with all those bridesmaids outfits and tuxedos) counts as a costume party. After all, taking off an elaborate costume in a swanky hotel room is just as much fun as putting it on.

If you want to have an affair, stop dreaming of “perfect scenarios”. Instead, use your imagination and go where all the pretty faces are waiting!

7 Things Women are Looking For in an Affair Partner

Statistically speaking, there are more women than men, and yet it still seems as if a lot of men hoping to have an affair “strike out” more often than not.

Women have their pick of whoever they want and the guys have to put on a great show just to be considered. In the end, the handsome and rich guys always win the race, right?

Not necessarily. It’s just that a lot of men haven’t quite mastered communication with women and either come on as too aggressive or too inhibited.

For the best results, learn how to read women, understand women, and more to the point, understand what women want in a sexual partner. Here are seven criteria that women are considering when looking for a guy just like you.

Emotionally expressive

You don’t have to “fall in love” but DO go for the emotional connection. Many men seem to think that just because it’s an affair, they can leave all emotions out of it. Which just doesn’t work because women are not attracted to robots.

Women want an emotionally attractive and engaging man. In other words: a human.

Men who come on as too sexually aggressive are intimidating and insulting to a woman’s intelligence. Real men know that the emotional element of an affair is the best part, it’s what stirs attraction in the first place.

Emotional connection means that you talk sincerely, confidently, and with a mature patience. At the same time, you don’t want to come across as too shy or inhibited, since flirting and desiring sex is what brings you both to the dance. Strike a fine balance between sexy and classy.

Better than the norm

You don’t have to be a perfect specimen, but “above average” in your demeanor. Women want a man at his best.

This doesn’t necessarily refer to looks, but men looking for extramarital sex can increase their chances of being selected from the amateurs by:

  • Maintaining a good weight and healthy figure
  • Keeping good hygiene
  • Keeping attractive personal habits, good “date” behavior
  • Looking for someone OUTSIDE their home city, and yet not TOO far away

You should be a man confident and upfront about his looks. Women want to see you right away so they can feel something.

This means not just confidence in person but enough confidence to post pictures online (in an ad or through email) that clearly show your face, body shape and personality.

Some women do have “types” and may be picky about the face. Sometimes however, a woman just wants to know you’re the “real thing” and not some bored man-child wasting everybody’s time.

Tone it down a notch

You should be smart but not arrogant, confident and flirty but not cocky. Women want a down to earth guy with nothing to prove.

Most women are turned on by men who demonstrate above average intelligence and social skills…however, too much confidence can appear patronizing, overly challenging or even cocky.

The best thing to do is to come across smart – but restrained. Don’t overdo it. Don’t try so hard that you scare her away or make her choose the next “smart guy” in line because you’ve insulted her one too many times.

She’s perfect the way she is

Be appreciative of whatever the woman gives you. Women want men who are into them.

It’s ridiculous how many guys out there are picky about the woman they’re trying to seduce. So what if she’s a little curvy or if she doesn’t like some particular sex act?

Women respond sexually and emotionally to men who make them feel comfortable in their own skin and who make them feel desired, and at ease. They tend to quickly dismiss the men who want to compare them to a fantasy porn star.

Humor matters

Be funny! Women are counting on you to lead and to be the breaker of tension.

You can’t really go wrong being a funny guy, since the situation tends to get awkward fast if you take yourself too seriously. Laughter helps a woman to relax and get in touch with her passions, in spite of guilt, awkwardness or doubts.

Laughter is an aphrodisiac and it will help endear you to your mistress, even if your surroundings aren’t ideal. Seduce her…don’t just wait for something to happen.

Check your baggage

Don’t hyper-focus on your love life or lack thereof. A woman needs to feel that you are there with her and don’t regret anything. You must also show that you are generally satisfied in your own relationship.

Any tip off that you’re unstable or not ready for a mature “secret” relationship where no one gets hurt and she’ll run the other direction. She can’t afford to have you mess anything up, nor does she want to ruin your life.

She needs to know you’re capable of handling this relationship and that you’re not coming loaded with baggage.

If you keep calm, stay strong and show her that you’re comfortable with the situation, you can help her to relax, enjoy the moment and explore her unsatisfied passions.

Be a little persistent but never needy. All it takes is commitment to getting to know this beautiful woman you want so badly and some genuine interest in understanding her point of view.

Famous Celebs Caught Cheating and What You Can Learn from Their Mistakes

Couples fall apart for reasons that become so complicated that the majority are filed under “irreconcilable differences” but the underlying reason is usually because one partner began looking for a conciliatory other while still married.

All marriages go through a few hard lumps. Sometimes you do have to adjust your life to accommodate another lover, but when you do so, you do it logically and with advance planning. Don’t be emotional or arrogant, like some of our celebrity cheater friends.

Don’t make the mistakes that these celebrities did. Learn from their mistakes and save your reputation!

Ashton Kutcher’s Life-Changing Adultery

celebs caught cheating

Their combined assets were worth $290 million, but the six year marriage between Aston Kutcher and Demi Moore hit the rocks when Kutcher’s wandering eye began distressing his wife…and led him into a well publicized threesome with two hot young girls.

Ashton says it was a life-changing moment because he experienced the pain and suffering of divorce first hand.

Kutcher recently received the Robert D. Ray Pillar of Character award at Drake University, Des Moines. He claims he learned to build character after Moore left him and the tabloids were calling him an adulterer. He now understands how much loss is there, how much love is there and that it’s not neat or clean or messy.

Lesson learned: Maybe not a huge threesome scene to start your discreet relationship!

Kristen Stewart’s Double Whammy

celebs caught cheating

Nobody wanted to believe that Twilight star, Kristen Stewart, was cheating on her long-term boyfriend, Robert Pattinson, when rumors first began surfacing in 2012, not even after photographs were published.

A number of loyal fans declared the photos, which showed Stewart and “Snow White and the Huntsman” film director, Rupert Sanders in a hot and heavy make-out session, had been photo shopped.

Sanders’ wife, however, had seen enough. After tweeting “wow” just moments after news agencies asked for her husband’s comments, she closed down her twitter account. One year later, after numerous attempts at reconciliation by both couples, Liberty Ross Sanders had filed for divorce and Robert Pattinson had packed up his pick-up truck with his belongings and left for parts unknown. He complained bitterly about her cheating and that she was always selfish, always moody.

Stewart only carries bittersweet memories of her teenaged love affair now, and a shattered reputation among Twilight fans, but the impact on Rupert Sanders has been much greater. His indiscretion dissolved an eleven year marriage.

Although he has joint custody of their two small children, he is liable for spousal support and attorney fees. He calls his affair with Kristen a mistake and a momentary lapse, but Liberty says it’s over for good. She just doesn’t have anything left to give anymore.

Lesson learned: Don’t go high-profile if you expect to get away with murder, sexually speaking. Choose someone outside your circle, away from the camera so to speak.

Leann Rimes and Eddie Cibrian: Two Cheaters Get Together

celebs caught cheating

Le Ann Rimes and Eddie Cibrian married after they were caught cheating together, but the smoke still hasn’t cleared from the battlefield. Country star, Le Ann Rimes, said her husband of seven years knew she was about to wander down the wrong track when she wrote a song about infidelity. She said she was writing it for a friend, but it was actually her subconscious talking.

A short time later, she was having an affair with Eddie Cibrian, who was also married.

Ex-husband, Dean Sheremet, says he sympathizes with Rimes, whose publicity lime light hasn’t shown very favorably on her since her split. A VH1 reality show with Cibrian was cancelled after just one season.

He admitted he may have over-managed some aspects of her life, but that overall, he and Rimes had been a good team and she had been foolish to walk away from it.

Ex-wife to Eddie Cibrian, Brandi Glanville, is not so charitable in her appraisal of Rimes. She claims that Rimes has been deliberately stalking her boyfriend and “checking out his stuff”. She claims Rimes and Cibrian’s two children deliberately showed up at a restaurant in Malibu after her boyfriend, Donald Friese, had posted that he would be going there. Glanville tweeted, “Stalking my boyfriend to show up with my kids is the last straw”.

Cibrian says this is the last straw and that Glanville’s made-up drama was extremely frustrating, but Glanville feels something’s coming to her after nine years of marriage. The divorce may not have gone the way she would have liked, but she has enough ammunition to keep Le Ann Rimes uncomfortable in public and shaky in her career.

Lesson learned: Easy on the stalking. In fact, don’t bother. It’s the opposite of logical!

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Biggest Regret

celebs caught cheating

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s versatile career has carried him from muscle beach to action film star with a dynamic personality that paved the way for politics. The sixty-eight year old activist took a knife wound to his reputation, however, when it was discovered he was the father of his housekeeper’s child. It also terminated a twenty-five year marriage.

It’s been six years since the Schwarzenegger’s split up, although they still haven’t officially divorced. Some suspect that neither one is willing to divide their shared four hundred million dollars in assets to two hundred million each.

Maria Shriver has announced she is back out in the dating world and is apparently uninterested in reconciling with her former husband. For his part, in a recent interview, when he was asked about his biggest regret, Arnold Schwarzenegger answered, it was the day he chose to cheat on his wife. But maybe the real mistake was…

Lesson learned: Don’t diddle the housekeeper. Don’t screw where you eat. How about, as a general rule, choose someone outside the house?

Ozzie Osbourne, the Dirty Dog

celebs caught cheating

He got down and dirty when his four year affair with his hair dresser was exposed by the news media. Ozzie Osbourne, front man for Black Sabbath, admitted publicly he had been caught cheating but apologized to Michelle Pugh, and all women he had been having affairs with, for believing they were having anything more than a fling. He told them he was a sex addict and was currently seeking therapy.

It rocked Ozzie fans who didn’t really want to roll with the break-up that seemed imminent when Sharon Osbourne learned of her husband’s infidelity. Perhaps it was because she had known him since she was eighteen, or because they had been married for thirty-four years, but Sharon forgave him, saying on public television that Ozzie was a dirty dog, “but my dirty dog”.

Ozzie was accepted back into the family fold, but Michelle Pugh wasn’t so easily forgiven for her extramarital role. Ozzie’s daughter, Kelly took the betrayal personally, tweeting “Anyone looking for a cheap chunky LOW-light and blow out and a b…..b, call…” then added a phone number that has since been disconnected. Pugh filed a lawsuit against Kelly for defamation of character, intentional infliction of emotional distress and public disclosure of public facts. She has since received an undisclosed settlement.

Lesson learned: Perhaps his mistakes was in having numerous affairs rather than just one or two regular sex partners. The higher the batting average, the more likely you will be discovered.

The Real Costs of Cheating

Every state varies in its determinations of child custody, child support, spousal support, division of assets and other awards, but one thing is certain. The courts are going to look more favorably on the spouse who didn’t cheat.

If you are caught cheating, you can expect to lose at least half your assets in the settlement.

A betrayal can cripple a promising career. It can damage reputations. It brings enormous pain to the ones who have been betrayed. It affects all the family members. Every once in a while, you’ll find someone amazing like Sharon Osbourne who will make it to that golden fiftieth because she stuck it out with her dirty dog, but most of the time, if you’re cheating on the love of your life and get caught, you’ve lost your lover for good.

Lesson learned: Don’t get caught…anticipate everything in advance and find someone who needs privacy and secrecy just as much as you do. Don’t make a mistake of celebrity-caliber proportions!

How to End an Affair: 6 Ways to Exit Without Drama or Trauma

Well that was hot! The sex was amazing. The danger of getting caught but escaping out of the window at the last minute was a rush. And all that awkward conversation you had in public, as you introduced your “work friend” to your spouse was strangely erotic.

And now it’s over…

But wait! Something’s gone terribly wrong. Just when you think your affair is over, now your mistress / “histress” is going all Fatal Attraction on you and is threatening to destroy your marriage, your family, your job and your entire life.

What next? Is she going to show up at your house? Or kill the family dog? Or write graffiti all over your garage?

No sex is worth this kind of stress!

So yes, it is actually really important that you give some thought to ending an affair “drama-free” well before the extramarital relationship starts to finish. Because breakups that are done impulsively and without sensitivity do often end in disaster.

But not to worry…here are a few tips that can help you end an affair without drama, violence or hysteria.

Prepare her for the inevitable well beforehand

This direct attitude may not help you get laid, but what it will do is help you avoid encouraging false expectations in her. Make it clear that this is about sex, or attraction, but that you doubt you will ever leave your spouse.

Your sex partner may not want to hear that, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he/she won’t sleep with you. It just means you avoid the topic and don’t think too much about the future. On the other hand, promising her the world and then disappointing her time and time again is a one way ticket to your personal hell!

Avoid emotional bonding with your mistress

This is the first sign of a truly dangerous turn in the relationship – when the sex partner tries to assume the role of second “wife” (or husband) and wants to bond emotionally, share intimacy, or talk about love. This means your partner is falling for you romantically and that may change their expectations.

In their mind, they now view your spouse as the enemy and will always be plotting to steal you away from your family. You must be alert to signs that the sex partner is falling for you, and escape RIGHT THEN rather than stick around to help amplify that feeling into Love.

Interestingly, it’s not always about the mistress either. Some relationship experts speculate that no person – except sociopaths and sex workers – can completely detach themselves from the emotional element of sex.

Guilt and remorse can plague a person and if you suffer from this, you may actually be the catalyst that brings drama and stress to your own relationship – with the spouse and the mistress.

Be very clear, and don’t be overly nice or hopeful

Many men make the mistake of either being too nice or being too distant. Both are wrong approaches that will result in a confused mistress trying to reach you for clarification.

Don’t be hopeful or overly sensitive if you are conveying to her that it’s definitely over – and there is no chance of starting up again. On the other hand, do not be abrupt and cease all communication, because a mistress can misinterpret this as just “time off” and think maybe things can start again in the future.

You have to be tough, firm and very clear that the relationship cannot continue. Give her (or him) specific reasons why it has to end and do not try to butter them up, flatter them or make them feel happy.

You can be apologetic but you still have to be firm in saying goodbye. Being wishy washy and continuing to text or chat with her is sending mixed messages.

Do your homework beforehand

One reason so many guys get into these dangerous extramarital affairs is because they just blindly have sex with whoever they can get, rather than thinking about the best “type” of mistress who will not destroy their lives when the relationship runs its course.

For instance, they avoid using real names or giving any personal information. This way, they can leave the relationship whenever they choose with no personal attachment.

One mistake that a lot of men make is to become involved with someone emotionally immature or weak, rather than limiting one’s self to mistresses who are self-confident. For example, self-confident working women…they are more likely to get over a breakup than a woman who is a more “dependent” personality.

Sometimes recognizing someone’s weakness or immaturity in advance of the affair is the best way to prevent it from spiraling out of control.


Well, this may be an act of desperation, but sometimes it’s necessary if you are serious about moving on and never looking back.

Leaving town forever can serve more than one purpose. Not only does it remove temptation from you but it can also reduce the risk of being caught.

Granted, you do have to use your imagination and find a good reason to move (like a job transfer or to be near family) but if you are running out of other options on how to keep your family together, it may be a last resort.

Start dating a new mistress

If you are genuinely concerned about not having the self-control needed to dispose of the relationship, then maybe finding a new mistress – one without emotional bonds – may help you lose interest in the other person you no longer want.

Doing so not only distracts you from the unwanted mistress but will also make you a more selfish and unsatisfying lover or possibly make you uninterested in having sex with the old mistress altogether.

It will make you seem emotionally unavailable and nothing worth wanting – perhaps the mistress will start to see these negative aspects of you and be willing to let you go.

It sounds a bit cruel, perhaps, but sometimes being a bit of a bore, or a pig, is the best way to “cure” your mistress of any mistaken notions of love.

Some men may actually go so far as to increase their negative behavior rapidly – assuming characteristics that he knows his sex partner doesn’t like. Whether that’s arrogance, possessiveness, pathetic or subordinate behavior, or some other inglorious trait, the mistress is more likely to end the relationship if she sees the person has drastically changed.

Actively planning to discourage and avoid drama is the best approach. The worst thing you can do is try to downplay drama as it is happening. In this case, that famous cheating scoundrel Benjamin Franklin was right – “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”!